What is family loyalty

We are related through blood, but only through loyalty do we become families

Last update: 01 December, 2016

We are born into this world and from the first second of our lives we share our blood and genes with a number of people. It is our family members who let us be part of their lives and their educational methods; who try to convey to us their values, which we ourselves consider to be more or less correct.

All inhabitants of this earth have a family. Having a family is very easy because each and every one of us has its origins and roots. But maintaining them and knowing how to keep them growing, how we can look after them day in and day out to see that they continue to stay united is a much more difficult task.

Everyone has a mother, a father, maybe siblings, uncles, aunts. Sometimes a family includes extended relatives of our parents, whom we probably no longer think about and with whom we have less to do with. Do we have to feel guilty about this?

The truth is Now and then we feel this almost “moral” obligationto get along well with that one cousin with whom we have almost no interests and who has despised us so many times in our lives. It may be that our blood connects us, but in the puzzle of life we ​​do not fit together as puzzle pieces. Therefore, we should not blame ourselves for distancing ourselves from this person or for dealing with them appropriately.

But how does this situation relate to our closest family members - our parents or siblings?

This relationship goes far beyond the blood relationship

Sometimes it feels like being a family means that we not only share blood and genes, but much more. Many of us believe that a child shares the same values ​​as his parents, defends the same ideology and ethics. But is that true?

Mothers and fathers often wonder how different siblings can be. But how can that be when all children have the same roots? It seems to us that it is within the family there would be perfect harmony, in which nobody should fall out of the ordinary and everything should run in a controlled and orderly manner.

But we must remember that our personality is never 100% identical to another person's essence. Some traits are always inherited, and living in a family community undoubtedly leads us to adopt a range of different behaviors. But children are never an exact copy of their parents, nor will they ever be, as much as parents want it to be.

A personality continues to develop, day by day, and there are no limits to this development - even if some mothers or fathers sometimes try. As a result, parents sometimes clash with their children.

In order to establish a strong and secure family connection, personality differences must be mutually respected, and independence and security must be promoted equally. The true self of every individual must be accepted unconditionally and without punishment of words and deeds.

What are the key factors for a harmonious family life?

Many parents experience as their children move out, leave the former family life and gradually lose contact with them. There are siblings who no longer talk to each other and families who wistful look at empty chairs at the dining table.

But how can it come to this? Every family is a world of its own - a small world with its own ideals, its own beliefs, its own past that only they themselves know, and its own present that they know how to live out.

Even so, each of us has an idea of ​​what a family should be like.

The goal of education should be to release confident people into the world, People who have certain skills and are independent to help them luck can find, but at the same time know how to makes others happy. How do we do that? By giving our children a love that sets them no limits and does not control them. Through affection that does not allow punishing someone for who they are, how they think or act.

We shouldn't blame others for our unhappiness every time. It's not always the parents' faultthat today one feels insecure or unable to do certain things, or the fact that our brother may have been protected earlier than we were.

Parents always make mistakes in their upbringing. But we need to live our own lives and know how to act and when to raise our voices. We have to learn to say no and understand that we can approach new projects with confidence and maturity, make dreams come true, without having to be slaves to our family past.

Being a family doesn't always mean having the same opinion and point of view. And therefore, we must not judge, punish, or, worse, disregard our family members. Because such behaviors create distance and are responsible for the fact that we find more loyalty in our friends than in our own family every day.

Often we feel this "moral obligation" to family members, who once caused us pain, treated us badly or punished us believe that they need to keep in touch.

Of course, these people also belong to our family, but we also have to remember that life is about finding happiness and inner balance - inner peace. If one or the other family member violates our human rights, we should keep our distance.

The greatest virtue of a family is to accept one another for who one is, in an environment of pure harmony, mutual affection, and mutual respect.

Images courtesy of Karen Jones Lee